New Grief Program Offers Support in Times of Loss

“This is a place where people can increase connection and decrease isolation,” said Caryn Christiano, a counselor with Duke’s Personal Assistance Service. “A lot of times, people feel alone and misunderstood. I find there’s often a perception, whether they feel it or they hear it from others, that they should be over it. We want to tackle some of those faulty belief systems and help people understand what they will experience along this journey.”

The program is modeled after a virtual support group piloted at Duke Raleigh Hospital last year.

Carol Sorochinski, a Supply Chain Technology Systems Coordinator at Duke Raleigh Hospital, participated in last year’s support group and took steps toward some much-needed healing.

At the time, Sorochinski was trying to work through the grief of losing her older brother Billy two years earlier. She also felt more loss looming as her brother-in-law, Dave, was hospitalized after suffering cardiac arrest, and his wife, Sorochinski’s older sister, Debbie, was in the late stages of her fight with small cell lung cancer.

When her brother-in-law passed away and her sister moved into hospice, Sorochinski learned coping tips from counselors and discussed experiences with colleagues she’d previously never met, but quickly grew close with.

“It was very, very helpful for me,” Sorochinski said. “When I see people from the group in the hallway, I now stop and give them a hug because there’s a personal connection from all of us sharing and grieving together.”

Individual help with grief can be accessed through PAS, which provides up to eight no-cost, confidential short-term counseling services per concern for Duke staff and faculty. But, as Sorochinski, found, there is value in finding support among peers experiencing the same struggles you are.

“The camaraderie was the big thing for me,” Sorochinski said. “It wasn’t about feeling the need to share my story as much as it was listening to other people who were hurting and sharing what I had learned from what I had gone through. It made me feel like I was part of a team.”

Sorochinski’s experience with the support group contributed to her beginning a healing process that took a key step earlier this summer.

She eventually lost her sister Debbie, who served as the matriarch of a large extended family, in December. Each summer for the past few decades, Debbie and Dave spearheaded a large family beach trip to Oak Island that the family referred to as "Grammy's Beach Party." In July 2024, Sorochinski joined her family for its first beach gathering without Debbie and Dave.

With the family scattering Debbie and Dave’s ashes in the ocean, Carol brought special water-soluble paper that that counselors at Duke Raleigh Hospital helped her find – on which the children of the family could write messages to Debbie and Dave and let disappear into the sea.

“It was really beautiful and, emotionally, I think it helped everyone,” Carol said. “My little 6-year old grandnephew said it was going to dissolve and go right up to heaven.”

For more information on the Grief Support Group, including how to register, contact Caryn Christiano at caryn.christiano@duke.edu

Watch this video to learn more about no-charge services offered to staff and faculty by Duke's Personal Assistance Service.

Send story ideas, shout-outs and photographs through our story idea form or write working@duke.edu.

Follow Working@Duke on X (Twitter),FacebookandInstagramand subscribe onYouTube.